The State of the Black Male. Finding Your Lane and Thriving on Your Terms #ABalancedLife

Jamarcus Fields highlights that Black men are currently navigating a tough period, being thrust into leadership and mentorship roles they may not be prepared for, struggling with identity, and needing to unlearn lifelong beliefs while simultaneously addressing mental health issues and the challenges of re-assimilation post-incarceration.

Jamarcus states, 'it's a tough time for for for black men... being thrust into a position that honestly a lot of men aren't prepared for as uh as leaders, as as mentors inside of our community... struggled with uh you know, like identity crisis, trying to find out where we belong, how to move, what's acceptable, what's not... having to unlearn a lot of things that we thought were true... and re-educate ourselves... in real time.' He also mentions the increased focus on mental health and the struggles of men returning from incarceration.

Jason Starr emphasizes that education is vital for Black men to understand and navigate the complex systems (criminal legal, education, economic) that profoundly impact their lives. This knowledge empowers them to find their lane and advocate for themselves and their communities.

Jason states, 'educating ourselves on is the systems that impact our lives... criminal legal system... education system itself... economic system... they're not necessarily built, you know, for us or with us in mind, but we rely on them a lot... sharing information as black people about what are these systems, how do you navigate them, where can you go and get support for navigating them, and increase your voice.'

Pam Sams advises that for Black men, especially those with past challenges like incarceration, traditional funding sources may be inaccessible. Crowdsourcing from friends and family is a viable alternative, but it necessitates a well-structured business plan outlining operations, profitability timelines (3-5 years), and repayment or equity terms.

Pam suggests, 'you have to go to probably friends and family. Crowdsourcing would be probably the best way... if you are having some challenges through the traditional means... coming to them with um a business plan... how is it going to function... when you think you will become profitable... how are they going to get paid back?'

Dr. Tierney argues that a strong strategy, encompassing customer service, marketing, and sales, often leads to greater success than exceptional skill alone. She stresses the importance of coaching and mentorship to develop strategy, particularly for entrepreneurs, as individuals may struggle to see the 'big picture' or identify their own blind spots.

Dr. Tierney observes, 'people who were not that skillful be very successful because they had a good strategy... sometimes their cake might not be as great, but because they have great customer service, they they are very responsive, they, um, have great marketing, they do the numbers and they do the sales... This is where coaching comes in because you may not be good at putting together a strategy.'

Jamarcus Fields describes the profound harm caused by the generational teaching that 'Black men don't cry' or should not show emotion. This creates a 'Superman complex,' detaching men from their feelings, preventing healing, and leading to emotional numbness that can manifest negatively.

Jamarcus recalls, 'one of the worst things that we were taught as uh as kids... to be tough and not cry... developed this this Superman complex... detached us and made us void of our emotion... we never even addressed... it built a callus on us over time... we just keep passing that on... end up with generation after generation of individuals that are numb and will not address their emotions.'

Dr. Tierney warns that 'coping' often carries a negative connotation, serving as a form of escape rather than genuine healing. While some coping mechanisms (alcohol, drugs, sex, food, shopping) have obvious negative effects, others like excessive social media scrolling or gossiping are perceived as harmless but can prevent individuals from addressing root issues and fulfilling their purpose.

Dr. Tierney explains, 'coping can have a negative connotation... can be a form of escaping... not really address it, not really heal from it, not really get to the root of it... cope with alcohol, who cope with the drug, cope with sex, cope with food... scrolling social media... gossiping... it's all rooted in trying to feel better but we are not addressing the thing... that coping can turn into a pattern that turns into an addiction that turns into a lifestyle.'

Jason Starr and Charlotte Avery emphasize the critical need for creating safe, healthy, and constructive spaces for Black men and boys to connect. This includes intergenerational mentorship, team sports, and open family dialogues that teach emotional management and mutual accountability, moving beyond fear to careful navigation.

Jason states, 'important to have uh spaces for uh young men and boys to um connect... in like healthy and constructive ways... intergenerationally... foster a sense of shared and mutual accountability for community... not afraid of emotional reaction, but you're able to like understand it and manage it.' Charlotte adds, 'create a space for them to feel like they can talk... to teach them, even at a young age, how to build their own community... men do is they watch sports together... but they don't talk to each other.'

Dr. Tierney concludes that many individuals remain stuck because they don't truly know themselves or what they bring to the table, instead emulating others. Spending time to understand one's unique skills, purpose, and inherent worth is crucial for overcoming overwhelm, fear, and anxiety, allowing one to boldly pursue their true path.

Dr. Tierney asserts, 'most of us don't know who we are. And we don't know what we bring to the table... We are emulating what we see other people do... We haven't really tapped into your skills, and what is it that you've been called to do? What is it that you've been graced to do?... When you know you, sugar, you will learn how unstoppable you are.'